Finding meaning in words I find a lot of solace and constance in words and the English language. It’s something I’ve always loved, and English was always my favourite subject at school, so much so that I’m studying it at university. I find it so liberating that we have the power to express ourselves in […]
Today, I can stand up and say with confidence that I’m ‘a bit of a self-confessed oddball’. But, just over ten years ago, things were not so clear to me. I didn’t know much about anxiety and I definitely had not found a real way to express myself. I didn’t know who I was or […]
Why is it that some people seem to be able to gracefully accept compliments for a job well done, recognising the credit that they rightly deserve, while others try to divert the attention and want to run away from it instead? If you lean more towards the latter, then welcome to the club, because I […]
Recognising it’s time to get support At first I didn’t realise what was happening. But once the tears came, I knew I needed help. I felt like I couldn’t go out – not even to pick up my daughter from school. I was feeling completely worthless and like I was a failure. A friend would take […]
I have recently been diagnosed with an Autistic Spectrum Disorder (ASD). But, not only have I received this new label from my diagnosis, I’ve automatically picked up another label too… I am now classed as ‘disabled’. Now, I recognise my diagnosis, but does that really mean I’m ‘disabled’ just because I have been diagnosed with ASD? […]
I’ve always been introverted, but I haven’t always understood what that means. It wasn’t until my early twenties, that the word introvert was bought to my attention, and that changed everything. I’d often leave social situations feeling drained. I felt simultaneously jealous and grateful that I’m so different my older sister who was constantly out […]
What stops you from sharing yourself with the world? For me, it’s the fear of rejection. Built on that are the fears of failure and the fear of being seen for who I am; digging deep beneath it, it’s believing I’m unworthy and undeserving; all topped off with a dollop of feeling not enough. A […]
I lay in bed, staring at my white and boring bedroom ceiling in an attempt to ignore the alarm on my phone that is growing louder with each passing second. I know as soon as I shift my gaze and turn off that alarm, that I will have to deal with the fact that I […]
In a sense, this is a ‘Tale of Two Cities’ or, more accurately, two countries; actually three if you count this one. This short tale is about asking for help when you don’t think you need it. It is a tale of contradictions. In 2011 I moved, with my wife and two daughters, from a […]
My mantra through school and university life was ‘avoid all eye contact with the teacher and they likely won’t pick on you to answer a question’. It wasn’t that I was a bad student, in fact I was always among the ones topping the class. It’s just that my confidence just seemed to end beyond […]
Challenging exams As part of my Sustainability and Environmental Management course at university, I took a module for those who hadn’t done maths as an A-Level. I passed all the modules, except for maths as I’d struggled with the exam. An hour into the re-take of my exam, I was only on question 3. Given how long it […]
Two weeks ago I had an appointment with my doctor to discuss the medication I was taking for anxiety. Normal procedure would include me telling the doctor, in as little detail as possible, how I’m feeling and that I’m ok on my current medication. However, as I’ve felt my symptoms getting worse over the weeks […]