How shared stories create shared vulnerability

How one shared story can create vulnerability in a whole family

I’m feeling really vulnerable as I’m sharing my stories. I know that this is natural and what I really want is to let you to know that this is what’s going on for me. I know it’s not always clear from the outside!

There was recently a story published about me on Cornwall Live. I’d sent a press release about an event and what was published was this story about me being socially anxious and attempting suicide. It’s really one thing sharing my story with individuals and on my blog and social media. It’s entirely another thing to have my story out there for people have known me in the past; family and family friends to see my story. I was immediately struck with a sense of sickness, questioning if I had done something wrong in sharing my story like this.

I picked that apart and I think partly it was about concern about my story might bring shame on my parents. Parenting is a massive trigger and as a parent, you might feel like you have this sense of duty to protect your children and, I imagine, when you can’t protect your children you hurt. And I feel maybe there could be a sense of shame attached to your child having struggles. There certainly is a sense of shame attached to your child attempting to, or taking their own life.

So when I picked it apart I realised that my issue actually wasn’t having my story out there. I’m okay with people knowing what’s gone on in my life in the past and the things that I’ve struggled with. I know it’s for a good purpose; it helps other people to know they’re not alone. What I am still coming to terms with is how my stories might affect my parents and my sister and the view of their friends and family.